The Law of Equivalent Exchange

For some reason I feel that everything about me is changing. I feel that things that I have learned in the past don’t matter and that I have been doing things wrong this whole time. Maybe its because I’m in the country side and I have nothing but time to relax and reflect on myself and my past. I always thought that I was a decent person but the more I think about it the more I see my flaws. Again maybe it’s because of all this extra time I have and my past mistakes keep haunting me. I am beginning to see now that up until now that I have only been living for myself and not for others. I would like to change that.

Lets start the story with Saturday night. On my last class on Saturday there are usually four students but for some reason only one showed up. Because it became a private lesson I asked him what he would like to do, I had a lesson plan but it’s rare for him to have the opportunity to talk to me alone. He said that he just wanted to chat. So we did. I’m not quite sure how the topic came up but he stated telling me about his life and about how he has been very lonely lately. First you need to know that in the 90’s Japan was going through an economic depression and many had a hard time adjusting, many people resorted to suicide. He said that in the 90’s, he came home one day to find his family gone; his wife packed her and her child’s belongings and moved out. On top of that he was struggling financially. Then he began to tell me about all the times that he thought about committing suicide, but one day while he was coming home he found a injured cat on the side of the road. He picked it up and took it home. To make a long story short, after a lot of money and time he was able to nurse the cat back to health. And during that time he stopped thinking about suicide because he wanted to cat to get better. Then I asked him, “Who saved who?” It’s amazing how God chooses to effect and change our lives. I can’t stop thinking that something like that isn’t destiny but it’s an act of God. God didn’t solve his problems with money but love. That small cat probably saved his life.

After class was over I stayed behind for a couple hours to help the Japanese teach make flash cards. Well, I really stayed behind because it was early and I didn’t want to come home and be alone. We finished the cards and then I started on my way home. I was about 2 minutes from my apartment when a card decided to broadside my bike. I jammed my toe into the side of the car then proceeded to scrap my body against the road. (I know what I’m about to say will seem really stupid but at the time I felt it was the right thing.) When the man got out of the car I saw that he had been drinking, but there was just something about him that told me he was a good man and not some alcoholic, or maybe he was. But, I decided to let him go, he called his wife and she came to pick up him. I didn’t call the cops and I didn’t tell anyone about what happened. When I woke up the next morning my toe was still hurting so I decided to go to the hospital but they were CLOSED, who ever heard of a hospital being closed? Do people not get hurt on Sundays in Japan?

I had plans that day to go to a drinking party with some people at the school I studied abroad at last year. So I traveled the two hours on the train with my broken toe. I got there and had a great time with my friends, the alcohol was a great painkiller. I stayed there that night and went to school the next day with the other students. I wanted to say hello to some people and maybe say hello to some teachers, hoping to get a letter of rec from them. Nothing exciting happened at school except that one of the girls that I was friends with last year happens to live in Oyama (that's where I live). I was soooo excited because I hadn’t really made any friends, except for my students, and now I would have a friend. When she was done with her classes she and I returned home on the train together.

Her name is Yoko, she isn’t one of the cutest girls you have ever met but she has a great personality and there is something about her aura that seems pure, and good. On the way home on the train he contacted her family and told them about me and that I was living alone in Oyama and that I had no friends (well all my friends in Japan live over 2 hours away). Her mom said that I was welcome over any time and that if I was hungry to let her know and that they would send someone to pick me up. They are such a great family. They aren’t rich but they aren’t poor either. Yoko began to tell me about her family and THIS was the moment that I realized that I am very selfish and I want to change. She said that her mom always tells her and her sister that they need to live for others, not for themselves. If you have money, even just a little bit, and you can help someone and still live, then you should give the person money. She continued on about all the ways that he mom has taught her to help others in need. I didn't know what do to or what to say, a family that I didn’t even know has opened their house and hearts to me, I am very thankful. Being so far from home this is the first time I have felt the warmness of a family’s embrace.

The moral is that even if I do have a broken toe now, God has graced me with a kind and caring family. The law of equivalent exchange.